Hell Explained By A Chemistry Student

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    PsyWarriorMatrix.com Forum Index -> Humor
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
Cosmic Sage
Member


Joined: 30 Aug 2009
Posts: 369
Location: Fernandina Beach , FL. U.S.A

PostPosted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 1:39 am    Post subject: Hell Explained By A Chemistry Student Reply with quote

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
> The following is an actual question given on University of Washington
> Chemistry Mid term.
>
> The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared
> it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now
> have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:
>
> Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic
> (absorbs heat)?
>
> Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
> (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some
> variant.
>
> One student, however, wrote the following:
>
> First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we
> need
> to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
> at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a
> soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.
> As
> for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
> different religions that exist in the world today.
>
> Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their
> religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these
> religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we
> can project that all souls go to Hell.
>
> With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
> souls
> in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of
> change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order
> for
> the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume<BR>>
> of
> Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
>
> This gives two possibilities
>
> 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls
> enter
> Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all
> Hell breaks loose.
>
> 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in
> Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
> over.
>
> So which is it?
>
> If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year
> that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take
> into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then
> number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and
> has
> already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has
> frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
> therefore, extinct ...... leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the
> existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept
> shouting "Oh my God."
>
> THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
_________________
Wisdom Begins In Wonder
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    PsyWarriorMatrix.com Forum Index -> Humor All times are GMT
Page 1 of 1

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum